Green Grasshopper Goodbyes

About a month ago, I went out on my balcony to fetch the morning paper (so retro of me) and there on the ground was the most beautiful grasshopper ... dying. I managed to pick it up and looked right into that tiny green science fiction face. The mandibles were working but it looked like it had a busted leg and therefore, couldn't get anywhere to fend for itself.

It gave me a great opportunity to study the insect up close and notice how it brilliantly it had mimicked its leafy home, right down to the 'veins.' Mother Nature is so brilliant and always five steps ahead.

I placed it in a seashell and took it out back. Perhaps if I placed it on a big, flat leaf, it could rest up and recover? Wishful thinking. I managed to get it situated on a leaf and close to the moist earth. It went and hid, telling me that at least it was happy to be out of the bright sun. And there it died.

I was surprisingly sad about it. I mean, we'd just met! I said a little prayer and went on with my day, though I couldn't get that wee green face outta my mind.

Next morning, same exact thing. A gorgeous grasshopper was struggling on my welcome mat and near death. Since my mother was facing heart surgery at the time, I had to reject the "omen" word that kept flashing in my brain. I also neglected to post about it here.

Again, I grabbed the same sea shell and scooped up the new guy. "Is this going to be a regular thing?" I asked him. "Because I'm not sure I can be Dr. Snow White Kevorkian to the Insect World." His legs were also broken and he seemed weaker than the other, much closer to the end.

I took him to the same comforting plant out back and placed him on a leaf opposite the previous burial. Who wants to see the corpse of a fallen colleague as you yourself are dying? Nobody.

As I did the day before, I said a little green grasshopper prayer. Like the true dork that I am, I said that I was sorry that they had to leave, glad they stopped by on their final day, honored to meet them, etc. Yes, I am, without question, a Nature Nerd.

The next day, I was hesitant to fetch the paper. Would I be greeted by more brightly colored death? Thankfully, no dying grasshoppers appeared. But I guess the word is out - free no-fuss burials at my place. Anytime.